Tag Archives: NLP

A Quickie With My Food Boyfriend

24 May

Do you enjoy a quickie, or do you enjoy a longer, more languid session that is memorable and makes you smile every time you think about it?

Am I talking about sex or am I talking about food? The pleasure of eating is often compared to sex. A scrumptious meal, or your favourite food likely hits those same pleasure zones and creates similar chemical reactions in the brain.

What if we treated eating the way we treated sex? What if you took the time to get to know and understand what you are eating, or where your food comes from to gain a better appreciation from it? We know when we spend time on foreplay, the payoff is more satisfying. Why should it be any different with food?

How about this perspective. Think about mercy or sympathy “dating” as it were. There are times where you are less fussy or selective with our choice of partner. The person of the moment isn’t your type, or normally isn’t what you would go for, and they are certainly not the “one”. They may not even be good for you, however, they seem to be nice enough and it’s just easier and convenient for the time being. Sound familiar? Sometimes you are selective and will hold out for someone really worthwhile, but sometimes we just need to get a fix so we don’t feel the desire to hold out.

Do you do the same with food? “Ahh, it’s not a great meal, but I’m hungry and it will do”. It has no real nutritional value, but it tastes good. Is every meal you eat a mind blowing toe curling experience? Why not?

How long would you put up with bad sex? How does the thought of less than satisfactory sex feel to you? How happy would you be?

How long or often do you put up with mediocre or bad food, or food that doesn’t nourish you?

Think about the most fulfilling relationship you have or have ever had and what a wonderful experience that was or still is. What would you look like if  you treated your relationship with food like a relationship with the love of your life? Your food boyfriend if he had a voice, would he be able to convince you that:

  • It’s good for you
  • It’s good to you
  • It’s satisfying
  • You can trust and depend on it to take care of you
  • It thrives with love and attention from you

Is it time to have the “talk” with your food boyfriend or food girlfriend to see where this relationship is going?


All or Nothing

2 May

Over the years I have had to learn to temper my all or nothing way of thinking and rather intense personality. Sure there are times that I was super motivated, but it was usually because I felt that I had something to prove to someone else. One summer I lost 30 pounds when I got dumped by my long time boyfriend. (He broke up with me and got married two weeks later to a classmate he met after I told him to go out and make some friends). I was in the best shape of my life…physically. I even had a six-pack, for the first and only time in my life…abs!

My head space was a different story. I worked out like a fiend, for all the wrong reasons. It wasn’t about bring healthy. I actually lost my appetite, but continued to push myself physically, beyond exhaustion some times. Is it a surprise that I wasn’t able to maintain a six-pack and over the years gained over 50 pounds that I am still trying to shed over 20 years later?

It took me almost two decades to cut myself some slack, about not doing things I believed that I “should” do, or “needed” to do. For what or who do I need to do these things for anyway?  What would happen if I simply didn’t want to do it? The world didn’t end, and people didn’t hate me for it. As a matter of fact, no one even noticed or batted an eye during my self-imposed rebellion.

I finally started to get to know myself better. I became more open to try different and out-of-my-comfort-zone things, from massages, to chiropractic care, to yoga. These little openings lead to some fantastic experiences, some great, some disastrous, but all fantastic outcomes nevertheless.  I finally became curious about things, and didn’t care as much about what other people thought. What they thought about me didn’t change who I was inside, or make me a bad person.

What would you do for yourself if nobody cared, commented or noticed what you did? What makes you think they do now? What if you went ahead and did it anyway?

How liberating would that feel for you? Can you remember when you last felt or do you even know what it feels like to be liberated?

You. Liberated. How does that look on you?

A Life Without Fear?

12 Apr

I did short workshop today at our regional career fair. I decided to be a little outside the box and do a talk about fear. I called it “Don’t Freak Out”. I was able to connect it to education, empowerment, confidence and all the other good things that suddenly become fantastic opportunities and experiences once you get your fears out of the way. I asked the participants what their life would look like if they didn’t have that fear.

Flying? Public speaking? Water? Big flocks of birds? (Hey, I’m not judging but stop watching that Alfred Hitchcock movie if it keeps freaking you out)!

What is your fear and what would your life look like if you didn’t have that heart pounding, sweaty palmed eye watering response every time your fear reared it’s ugly head?

Are you afraid of public speaking? Have you ever tried to picture yourself as a larger-than-life persona with the crowd hanging on your every word and eating out of your hand, you beaming with confidence and a swagger in your step, owning that audience?

Or, is water your nemesis? Can you picture yourself on a swanky yacht eating bonbons on a clear jewel blue sea, with the warmth of the sun on your cheeks. How would your life look if you could have that picture in your minds eye instead of the one that is causing you distress?

I totally own that one of my biggest fears is failure. The funny thing, is that I don’t recall actually ever failing anything…well perhaps second year biology, but I saw that one coming a mile away despite my best efforts. How can I miss what I’ve never really had? I love the saying, ” What would you do if you know you couldn’t fail?”

What would you do?

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