Tag Archives: life coaching

What Is Your Suck?

6 May

Do you think your life sucks?

“My life sucks.”

It annoys the crap out of me when people say it or post it.

Really. Your entire life, every moment from the day you were born has sucked? Can anyone on this planet say that their entire life sucks? Moments, yes. Days? Perhaps, but not all 24 hours in a row. But an entire life of suck?

Surely there are some bright moments in the darkest of days. We may have to dig for them, but they are there.What if the worst moment or period of your life, was actually the best thing that ever happened to you?

That horrible relationship that made you stronger and no longer a victim and advocate for others with no voice.

That devastating loss of a loved one that spurred a movement that saves the life of others.

The loss of your limb that resulted in your new status as an international para Olympic athlete.

That car accident that left you scarred for life but introduced you to a side of humanity you never would have discovered if it never happened.

The job that you hated so much that drove you to discover your true passions and sparked your incredible journey of self-acceptance and discovery.

I look back at the more painful moments in my life, and I have to be grateful as they were part of who I am today.

I and many other people think I am awesome. I couldn’t be as awesome without that crap happening to me. Like manure to plants, so is the crap of life. It enriches you. Makes you more beautiful and stronger.

The next time you say your life sucks. Think about it. Does it really? I doubt it.


Be Careful What You Wish For

12 May

When will I learn?Image

I recently returned home from a nice 4 week holiday full of inspiration and growth. Upon post-travel reflection, I did everything that I wanted to do without even really realizing it. My adventures included taking part in a culinary raw food program, a visit with family in Chicago and running a half marathon with my non-lesbian travel wife.

For the past couple of years, I have been eying a particular program that really resonated with me. I finally decided to take it, but my preference was to have someone else pay for it, since it was kind of pricey.

I was awarded a grant that covered the tuition (five grand people!) I did apply for it, yes, but I wasn’t aware of the opportunity of this fund when I made this mental pact.

Now as far as the half marathon goes, you may think I’m only partially crazy but I didn’t train for it. True story. I ran about 3 times in as many weeks, slowed by a 4 month-old achilles heel injury. I upped my weekly swims and added a little Zumba action in there, but I was hardly in any condition to run 13 miles. And no, I am not naturally athletic. That statement is just plan funny. There was no way to get out of this race, as my friend was flying to Sacramento all the way from our Yukon home to meet me to run this half.

I have no choice. I’m all in. I decided that this was going to have to be a mental race.

I started with imagining (or visualizing or whatever you want to call it) myself feeling good and relaxed and not tired while I was running the race. I imagined all my blood cells healing, and being strengthened by the oxygen I was sending to all my muscles. I imagined that there was some healing energy sent to my heel to mend the broken cells that were causing me pain. I did some yogic breathing every night before I went to bed, and first thing when I woke up. I even did it during in-between my dream state as I rolled over to change sleeping positions. I talked to my body, thanking it for taking care of me and letting it know that I was depending on it to get us through without pain. I actually started to look forward to this race instead of being in denial with dread.

Then, pray tell, why am I surprised that I completed the race without pain or injury and felt the best ever than any race I have ever run? Why I am looking for the pain in my heel to return to the same level of discomfort before the race? Why should the pain resume when I asked it to heal? I don’t recall putting a time stamp on it.

I’m a slow learner who is still learning to trust my instinct and the power of my thoughts and my words, that’s why.

This has happened to me over and over again as I look back upon my life. I truly do get what I want, good and bad.

I better start using my powers for good.

I better start visualizing that house that I want to build on the lot that will become available at a bargain. I better start picturing myself doing what I love, in half the time with twice the pay than I am earning now. I better see myself facilitating those international workshops in incredible destinations. Perhaps I can even picture myself with my hot soul mate at my side as we roam the world sharing and enjoying our abundance with other – or if available I’ll take Hugh Jackman. I’m not that fussy.

Don’t get me wrong. Life wasn’t always sunshine and roses. I have had some dark times in my life, but the same formula applied. I imagined all these horrible things and negative feelings and gut wrenching scenarios. I was so afraid of them happening, that they actually happened. I can honestly say  that when I look back I can see that I created the very things that I feared the most.

I’m done looking back. No regrets. I had to have a little darkness to make the light times seem even brighter. I’m looking forward to seeing what comes true this time. We all can.

Picture it. Plan it. Play it out in your mind, but only the good stuff. You will be amazed how powerful your wishful thinking is, especially when it’s positive.

Be careful what you wish for.




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